jealousies:

i think my parents should be thankful that all i do is spend time on the internet. i could be a drug dealer or serial killer, but am i? no. you’re welcome

shutupaubrey:

i’m skilled in the culinary art of microwaving 

drakesquad:

tuggywuggy:

drakesquad:

i’ll be like 40 w/no kids and people will say “aw i’m so sorry for you” and i’ll be like how was the fucking wiggles reunion tour asshole i went to italy last week for fun and didn’t have to hire a sitter

This is a very sad mentality. To think oneself more important than that of progeny is the sign of a failed human life.

so the wiggles concert wasn’t as good as you thought it would be huh

merrimynt:

When your crush uploads a selfie

image

ocurences:

i like to tumblr all day

and tumblr all night

thats how i like to live my (lame) life 


Jul 28    via    +338967

softmikus:

yeah good grades are cool and all but have you ever had a good night sleep

sofapizza:

your sheep looks concerned

Europeans: I drove forty minutes to the Netherlands for some groceries and then I popped into Germany to see some of my relatives before driving back home.
Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
#australians: i drove for nine hours #now i'm nine hours away from home #no one is here #the streets are empty #how did this happen #where has civilisation gone #i am alone in the universe #oh wait no there's an echidna it's okay
cursor made by mywarpedromance